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The Custody Comics and Cartoons
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Result page:   1  2  3  4  5  6  Next  (119 images)

1.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-16 Pub. Date: 2012-05-16
Image Number: 80977
Caption: So how's Lionel? No, I don’t think I should take him to Roxanne's. After all, I sued to share custody 50-50, because I was raised by a single mom and I know how important a mom is to a son. Not my fault the court gave me sole custody. Um … Ok. I resent your insinuation that I'm doing something wrong.
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2.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-21 Pub. Date: 2011-12-21
Image Number: 74335
Caption: Are you gonna take Lionel to his mom's house for Christmas? Families should be together on Christmas. I called her. … And I don’t care if she was joking or not, she's pure evil. That's mean. Before hanging up on me, she said she only celebrates Halloween. Still, "evil"? She said they ate lawyer, with all the trimmings.
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3.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-17 Pub. Date: 2011-12-17
Image Number: 74022
Caption: Goodnight, son. Goodnight, Luther. What did you call me? Luther. Why did you call me "Luther"? Becauth mommy thed that'th your name. Oh. "Loser." That'th what I thed!
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4.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-12-13 Pub. Date: 2011-12-13
Image Number: 74018
Caption: Once upon a time, there lived a little boy. What wath hith name? "Lem …" Um … "Lamond." Oh. The little boy didn't know his father, and his mother refused to ever talk about him. What wath her name? "Momma." Oh. This little boy had no male role model other than the one he say on tv. What wath hith name? "Heathcliff Huxtable." Oh. Then one day this little boy had to start over because he lost his train of thought. What color wath hith twain?
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5.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-26 Pub. Date: 2011-11-26
Image Number: 73212
Caption: Clyde! Thank God I reached you. I'm supposed to pick up Lionel today, but the paper just sent me to report on a war zone. I tried calling Roxanne to tell her I'd pick him up next week, but she's not answering. She's probably already outside with Lionel waiting for me. You're my best friend in the world, I know I can count on you: I need you to go to my apartment, put on my hat and coat, then go to Roxanne's house, pretend to be me, and pick up Lionel. You missed me, fool! At the sound of the beep, go 'head an' leave a message. Beep. I said beeeep.
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6.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-22 Pub. Date: 2011-11-22
Image Number: 73208
Caption: Where you been, Big L? Well … Roxanne said … … "You may have won custody of Lionel, but you didn’t win custody of his stuff." So I was out buying a crib, a playpen, all sorts of things. I'm picking up Lionel after work today. Cool. What he do for a living? What? What?
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7.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-21 Pub. Date: 2011-11-21
Image Number: 73207
Caption: You won custody, but I don’t see you in any big hurry to take your son from your ex. Maybe you only wanted to "win," but you didn’t really want the responsibility. It's only been a day since the ruling. Really? Feels like it's been two weeks. Ok, ok, I'll stop talking about it.
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8.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-18 Pub. Date: 2011-11-18
Image Number: 72986
Caption: Lemont, I'm so happy for you that you won custody of Lionel. I know you're going to be an incredible father. I don't know that. I didn’t have a father growing up. I don’t know what being a dad means. I may totally screw him up for life. Tap t- What if I don’t know how to teach him to be confident, honorable, brave, ambitious and love Star Trek? What if I somehow make him a bloodthirsty, insecure slacker who's into reality TV? Tap tap tap. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Thanks. Tap t- ta- tap t- I'm so proud of you!
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9.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-17 Pub. Date: 2011-11-17
Image Number: 72985
Caption: facebook. Messages. From SASHA MITCHELL. I can't leave Webster right now, Lemont. It doesn't matter how mean he is to me … I have children. When you have kids, your life isn't yours anymore. It’s theirs. If leaving a horrible marriage is going to make their lives worse, you STAY. Because your own life is over, over, OVER. Can we change the subject? How are YOU doing? I just won custody of Lionel. Tap tap ta- tap t- t- Um ... By all that, I meant to say your life is just beginning.
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10.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-11 Pub. Date: 2011-11-11
Image Number: 72738
Caption: I know I won custody of Lionel, but I left him with Roxanne for a few days because it's the right thing to do. I want to give her time to break it to him that he's going to be living with me from now on. If I just wrench him away from her, it could give him an abandonment complex, leading to a lifetime of cynicism, jealousy, misogyny and failed relationships. He's two! Just jingle some keys and he'll be fine! But that could lead to a lifetime of trying to fill a bottomless void with shiny toys.
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11.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-10 Pub. Date: 2011-11-10
Image Number: 72737
Caption: So where's Lionel? When do I get to meet him? He's still with Roxanne. The judge ordered her to turn over Lionel immediately. So that night, I went to her place. She let me in. She begged me to let him stay the night. Lionel was sleeping in her arms. What was I supposed to do? Wake him up. You can do that?
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12.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-31 Pub. Date: 2011-10-31
Image Number: 72408
Caption: What do you mean "won what?" I won custody of Lionel! I blogged about it last Saturday. Oh. That's ok, I'm not surprised you didn't read it. Saturday is the least-read day of the week, according to my blog's stats. So I'm not offended, or anything. You have a blog?
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13.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-29 Pub. Date: 2011-10-29
Image Number: 67159
Caption: The judge gave you full custody of Lionel?! Yeah! I won! Dios mio, Lemont! I'm so happy for you! I've never won anything in my whole life!!! Of course you have! You have friends who love you, you do what you like to do for a living, and you've got your health. And apparently you don't ever go hungry. Quit while I'm ahead!
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14.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-28 Pub. Date: 2011-10-28
Image Number: 67158
Caption: Judge Dubois delivers her decision. Custody cases are rarely this cut and dry. On one hand, we have a father who's suffered from psychotic delusions, has no money, and spends time with unsavory characters … And on the other hand, we have a mother who happens to be my daughter ... We're dead. Whom I personally know to be crazy-making, lying, manipulative, free-loading, and is, herself, the epitome of an unsavory character.
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15.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-27 Pub. Date: 2011-10-27
Image Number: 67157
Caption: Hello, Lemont. I just wanted to wish you luck and show you there are no hard feelings. Well … Thanks, Roxanne. In fact, after mother … I mean, the judge … grants me full custody, I promise only to tell our son about your many shortcomings in the most positive light. My attorney tell me I have a good chance, Roxanne. We've given the judge a lot to think about. The judge is ready to rule?! It's only been thirty seconds! We're dead! We're ... Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't see you standing there. How much of that did you ... Maybe I'll do you a favor and not tell him about you at all.
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16.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-26 Pub. Date: 2011-10-26
Image Number: 67156
Caption: Closing Arguments. Your honor, that was a very moving closing by Mr. Brown's attorney. I'd like to point out two things, though. Yes, it was brave of Mr. Brown to fight for custody of his son even though his flaws are many and readily apparent to all, but ... My client, Roxanne, is your daughter. That's number one. Number two is ... Just kidding. We really don't need a number two, do we? I think I do.
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17.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-25 Pub. Date: 2011-10-25
Image Number: 67155
Caption: Closing Arguments. Your honor, there are many reasons to deny my client custody of his son. He's black and poor, the mother's white and rich. He hangs with thugs and nobodies, she hobnobs with the rich and politically connected. But your honor … My client knows all this. And he came here anyway, knowing all his flaws would be exposed and ridiculed! What does that tell you, your honor? That he's an idiot? That he's a moron? That he loves his son that much!
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18.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-24 Pub. Date: 2011-10-24
Image Number: 67154
Caption: Closing Arguments. Your honor, you've heard a lot of reasons why Lemont Brown should not be given custody of Lionel. You've heard that his friends are thugs, liars and miscreants. You've heard he's a poor, pudgy Star Trek fanatic who may be mentally unhinged and never calls his mother. Get to the "but" already! Haha, you said "butt!"
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19.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-17 Pub. Date: 2011-10-17
Image Number: 66792
Caption: Excuse me, I just thought you should know you missed your train. What? Who are you? How do you know? I know everything about you. I know everything about everything. I know you're on your way to closing arguments in your custody hearing, but you've fallen asleep on the subway platform and you're dreaming. Steve Jobs? I also know you should get that mole checked.
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20.  
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-10-06 Pub. Date: 2011-10-06
Image Number: 66214
Caption: So what happened when you talked to Roxanne? I went well. Who needs a lawyer. I convinced her I have a good chance of winning custody of our son. Then she hugged me and excused herself to go book a trip to eastern Europe. That sounds slightly less well, out loud.
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